Dating is tough even in the best of circumstances. Sure, we have all these social media tools that save us time and energy in figuring out our interest level before meeting in person. But even as efficient as sliding into dm’s and snapping each other can be, the ultimate goal is to make a connection that can translate in person. So, what happens in the middle of a global pandemic when that part of dating isn’t a possibility? In a world where we are now going to school, church, and even the doctor virtually- could virtual dating now become the new normal?
Week 5 and we are now getting close to the end of this virtual dating social experiment. For every successful relationship, it seems you always hear two scenarios. First, there is the whole love at first sight/whirlwind courtship, where words like "meant to be” and “destiny” are always used. Gross.
Now to each their own, but I can tell you this could never be my path to love. I'm an overthinker by nature, and If hiring a private investigator to do a background check on a guy before you dated him wasn't socially discouraged, financially prohibitive, and completely psycho - I would choose that route.
Which leaves us with scenario number two. That would be the "we started out as friends" path to love. So with this in mind, I thought it would be fun to go out on this week’s virtual date with a very good friend. You know the kind that knows you so well that you’re fairly confident he doesn’t even think of you as a female with girly parts at this point.
Enter JJ. He is both a CWU freshman dual-sport student-athlete and an attractive ginger, both of which are surprisingly hard to find. I met JJ at fall camp this year. Athletes report to school weeks before everyone else, and they put the freshman boy and girl athletes in a dorm together during fall camp. As you can imagine, when a bunch of 18-year-olds who have never lived away from home before finding themselves together at night after crazy long days of working their butts off...well, things go down.
But the single greatest thing about fall camp? It is where I found my people. My friend group that made my freshman college experience everything I always dreamed it would be. Well, until this whole corona thing.
JJ is the dad of this group. I named him the Jedi because he is both the protector and peacekeeper of our galaxy. That, and because finding an adjective that starts with J is super duper hard. He's always easy to talk to, completely non-judgmental, and the guy that will wake up and come to your room in the middle of the night when you don't feel safe.
This guy’s the total package and the definition of husband material, so what's the hold-up? Well, I share him with my roommate and best friend Macy and short of becoming a thruple (and I'm just not that progressive) I don't really see a way forward here.
Be that as it may, I still wanted to give this date everything I could. I thought hard of questions to ask I didn't already know the answer to. I did full makeup and even put on a top to show some skin (in an effort to remind him I do in fact have girly parts).
The date was easy, comfortable, and surprisingly informative. JJ tends to be Switzerland in all things and doesn't have a lot of strong opinions, which drives me nuts sometimes, but I was able to get some useful insights. He knew exactly the type of guy I needed, including that he must be a good listener as i “tend to ramble”. Facts.
I also learned the biggest issue currently hindering my love life is playing hard to get. Outside of this blog, where I'm basically begging for dates- I live by a singular philosophy in my dating life. If they wanted to they would. I don't want to snap first, I don't want to ask the guy to hang out, and I don't want to make the first move. Apparently, guys don't dig that. Whoops.
The best part of the date was there was no need to put our best foot forward. JJ already knows what I look like in glasses and zit cream. He gets the extraness that I bring to all things. He laughs when I’m an idiot and is patient when I’m a lot. There was that part of the convo where he forgot about the one time he tried to make a move on me and now seems freaked out by the idea of it. Slightly offensive, but whatever.
Truth is, I love this man. And I don't want to say in a brother and sister way because the thought of making out with him someday is not entirely off the table. And if Macy were to ever die in a tragic accident... first off Mace, I promise I would be very sad. But then after an appropriate period of mourning, I'd probs call dibs on JJ, and I know you'd be looking down from heaven supporting our love. And don't worry, I will tell our red-headed children stories about their Aunt Macy, and you will always live in our hearts....
Orrrrr more likely, we will always just be friends. And that's pretty great too. So the moral of this story is maybe sometimes friends can turn into something more, but most of the time they probably won’t. But either way the cool part is with friends you don’t really have to look for love- cuz you already have it:)
*If you’re a CWU student, 18-24, not a serial killer, and interested in taking me on a Zoom dinner date- DM @881theburg on Instagram
Laynie Erickson is a CWU Freshman and volleyball student-athlete. She is a native of La Center, Washington and likes scary movies, breakfast for dinner, and nice boys in sweater vests. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter @laynieerickson