Around the Weird in 80 Days: The Red Planet


Photo Credit: Google, labeled for reuse.

Peculiar pleasantries citizens of the weird. We are soon coming upon the end of the year but hopefully not the end of us. I hope everyone enjoyed my shows last week about Big Foot (not related to Burg Foot) and Trees. I still am unsure what the purpose of trees is. Let me know if you find out. I have more fantastical stories for you this week, but first I want to talk about a topic that has caught the world abuzz: Mars.

For those of you who pay no attention to the stars or have never read a book on astronomy, Mars is one of our celestial neighbors. It was charted in the sky by Egyptian astronomers back in the days of the Pharaohs, and Aristotle talked about it in his work. Eventually, people decided to name it after the Roman god of war instead of calling it “Sky Terror #6.” In recent years, scientists have sent probes, landers, and rovers to examine the planet in the hopes of finding signs of life and water. Private companies, including one led by Elon Musk, have sought to land on Mars and develop a colony. I find this admirable even if it is the set up to a space horror movie.

I am excited about the possibility of humans visiting Mars. I, for one, would love to be the first person to host a dance party on Olympus Mons. I have wondered what scientists are likely to find on Mars. There are people who say that any life on Mars died out millennia ago. These people are no fun at parties and must be shunned. Other people have suggested that Mars has an underground colony of Martians just waiting for foolish humans to step foot on the planet. Or it is home to microbes. Personally, I believe that people aren’t being creative enough with their explanations. Mars could be the place where radio station brand managers gather to discuss soup recipes. It is likely that the Russians have beaten us to Mars already and have developed a colony that will destroy anyone else who attempts to land there. What I’m saying is that Mars is fun for the whole family.

If you have any ideas about what is on Mars, please write a letter to NASA as they value your opinion. Until then, make sure to tune into my show at 9PM Monday night as I attempt to describe this strange new thing called the Internet.

#Mars #OlympusMons #planet #NASA #aliens

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